My secret.

How I can be so cool talking about getting old, cancer, heart attack, pain… and (sometimes) laugh about it all?
You see, when I was younger I didn’t want to think or talk about old age or death. But few years ago I started to read books about death and dying. I just wanted to know, to be prepared what to expect when the time comes. And I’m glad I did. I accepted IT. And now I’m okay with IT.
You see, in my life I cheated Death few times, or rather I outsmarted IT. With the help of Angels, of course. Or I can say – it wasn’t my time to go yet… This how I learned, from my own experience – long time ago – that we are immortal, until our time comes….
So why worry? Let’s just live our lives to the best of our possibilities – one day at a time – because nobody knows what tomorrow will bring, anyway. Nobody.
And to tell you the truth, I think that all the bad things that could happen, have already happen to me. Only one more is left – that one day I will have to die…. But so does everybody else. And the good news is that we have to die only once…. πŸ™‚ !!!
And now I just want to live, not only be alive – without any fear of the future.
I have faith that everything will be okay, the way it supposed to be.
I like this quote from @vandajo:”Faith is not knowing what the future holds but knowing who hold the future”. – Amen! Thank you Vandajo!
So I’m happy and thankful that I’m today how I’m. And what tomorrow brings???
………. Whatever will be, will be………. Que sera, sera!!!

God Bless you all! Thank you all for reading, “like”-ing, commenting. You are all my inspiration!

104 thoughts on “My secret.

  1. I loved the way you have honestly confessed about your fear of dying one day and at the same time your realization of the truth to live at the fullest has made this post amazing ….:) Bravo to you and your positive outlook ..

  2. There is only one thing for sure in our lives that we know and that is… One day we will die… The rest is as we make it!! ❀❀

  3. Beautiful words, Anna, and you’re an inspiration to some us too πŸ™‚ Here’s a poem for you πŸ˜‰

    Composed at Random

    Human life is an endless struggleβ€”
    The post-horse and plow-ox.
    On the brows of the Daoist sadness never grows:
    Quietly holding a book of immortality, seated by the window,
    What else is there to seek?

    Prospects disappear, far, far away,
    Months and years are hard to detain.
    In a hundred years’ time everyone will be a pat of mud,
    So arrange a firm and safe place in your own mind
    And let the boat float with the stream.

    Gu Taiqing (1799-1877)

  4. Sometimes I feel the western culture does not prepare us well for death. It is something we fear, something we do not talk of but it is something that happens to all of us. I was recently living in Mexico, and learned a lot about death and the acceptance of it. You will see skeletons and skulls everywhere in Mexico as decorations, especially during Day of the Dead, and for the Mexican celebrating death is the same as celebrating life. A lovely post!

    1. True on the account that we don’t prepare for death. Yet we prepare for life and living every day. We plan ahead. With holidays and functions, but don’t talk about death! Yet it’s there for us all, we can be sure of this one thing. As a pastor, when someone dies or someone is dying, it never ceases to amaze me how we deny the inevitable. Bless you all

  5. So refreshing to see positive thinking. I needed this reminder and this hit just the uplifting spot. I’m done reading blog post for tonight for I want to stay with this uplifting post in mind. πŸ™‚

  6. Great post. Being positive goes a long ways. I like to live by…change what I can and don’t worry about what I can’t change…and just enjoy every moment of life. It sounds like that is exactly what you are doing. Blessings and hugs!!

  7. I admire you for your great attitude. I was disappointed in some of the comments. They were all encouraging, yet I am not sure they really got your message. I believe you are saying that you know that Jesus Christ has paid for your sins and you will see Him in heaven. Please forgive me if I am wrong in my interpretation. May God bless you.

  8. I do admire your attitude. I will add you to my prayers along with the many others that I have on the list. It seems that there are more and more every week. God is with each of you and He loves you and will use your example to others as a positive influence in their lives. God bless you!

  9. I was reading through pages of your blog and the result at this moment is: smile. Why a smile? Because you’re doing exactly what I wanted to say to you when I read one random blog at your page. I think the right way is to do what you feel is right and not to worry about what will happen, because when the time is right it’ll come, otherwise you can stay immortal as long as you want-it’s all in your will and positive thinking! Warm greetings from Europe πŸ™‚

  10. Anna,
    I think your courageous quest for la healthy ife has some inspiring qualities. You weigh the most promising solutions, try them out, and then share them with the world through your blog. May your journey be blessed. Thank you for stopping by my blog and liking my post. Betsy

  11. I wanted to stop in and say thanks for being such a loyal fan of Indigo 2 Crystal! I regret not venturing to your blog before now. I see it is chock full of good info. We definitely have that interest in common. I will try to make it point to stop by more often from now on. Thanks again! Karen

  12. Great post. I subscribe to the Buddhist philosophy of “dying unto death”. If we approach each day as our last on earth, we can access not only a sense of peace but also inspiration to live life to its fullest. Keep on going!

  13. I know what it means to cheat Death – I was caught in a rip when I was 18. This was on the southeastern coast of Australia and by the time someone was able to drag me out I was a pretty shade of blue.
    The police officer said later that another five to ten minutes out there would have finished me.

  14. Death is an ancient fungus. Its spores are everywhere. Once the immune system has to underlie, while the dead body contributes to the fungus continuence and goes the way of decay. I admire traditions of sky burial, in particular the Tibetan ceremony. Many thanks for you faithfulness.

  15. Dear Anna, thank you for liking my posts.. Wow, I’ve just had a privilege of visiting your page. I’ve been humbled and motivated by your shares…

    I watched the following message earlier on today. It empowered me and strengthened my belief in healing from heaven – I listen to this man’s messages quite often. This one is called “The impact of the Holy Spirit on the human body”

    I want to see you live,

    Love, Monika πŸ™‚

  16. Like Monica, above, I’m so honored that you liked my posts. You’re an amazing inspiration to us; thank you for sharing your journey and your thoughts with us. Wishing you health, and continued peace and serenity.

  17. Dear Anna

    At first I was blown away by your bravery and honesty and could not respond. Death…… it is a guarantee, however when we are told that we must greet Death in our earlier years, it is shocking to our lives, our minds and heart. For most of us have plans in life, people to love and meet, life to live and dreams to unfold and greet unexpectedly.
    Facing cancer with such bravery and honesty is more than inspirational – it is a testament (even this word does not do you justice) to your internal fortitude you face each and every day, every moment of thought you have.
    While many of us have had trauma in our lives, most of us have not stared death in the face, have needles poked in our arms, seen multiple doctors and therapist and the agony and pain of the proposed curing panacea that leaves you weak and at times senseless.
    My heart goes out to you with the utmost respect for sharing your experience, more the honest nature of your life as it is currently being lived. More your acceptance of your life and yet the hope of continued life in each day is phenomenal. You are more than a “just great attitude” rather a lively human shinning brightly, walking more than a speech, reaching out to many with a brilliant heart.
    Thank you
    In highest regard

  18. Ealier this year I suffered a miscarriage and almost died because of having lupus that I was never diagnosed with. After many months of being unstable and being in the hospital almost dying countless times over the past few months I am in total agreement about being immortal until its time to actually die. I also am aligned with your outlook on life. Man life is so beautiful and it is such a gift. I could sit back and cry about all this debt I had and the son I lost or I can rejoice that since I’m a christian I will see my son again minus the pain and suffering and be excited that I still have time here with my wonderful husband, family and friends. Not to mention that my recovery process after all those months of being unstable is nothing short of a miracle itself. I am so glad to have read your post. It bolsters my strength and confirms my belief that you can either live with your life happening to you and suffer as a victim or LIVE your life and enjoy it No Matter What πŸ™‚

  19. I admire your positive outlook on death. As the Bible says “The Lord gives and the Lord takes away, blessed be the name of the Lord.” It is true one never knows, my son was killed from a motorcycle accident at the age of 27. I am blessed by the assurance that he now resides in Heaven because of his faith in Jesus Christ as his Savior. I pray The Lord Almighty continues to give you peace and strength as he draws you closer to Him. πŸ™‚

  20. Thank you for popping by and viewing my blog. It seems you have been through an incredible journey and I hope that your health continues to improve. I almost cheated death a few times myself as did both my parents. But never say never I say and continue to enjoy what life brings you and keep up the great work. πŸ˜€

  21. thanks for being such a loyal reader of my blog. i’m sorry i’m not more polite about returning the favor. i shall try to do better from now on. by the way, i admire–and envy–your plucky, can-do attitude about life’s adversity. bully for you!

  22. Sometimes we caught up in life, things, work, buying more. I have to remember to be grateful for each day I am alive. My Dad passed away in March and I miss him terribly. Thank you for reminding me that I need to “live my life to the BEST of my possibilities ” every day.

    Thank you for liking my post at esperanza learning. Esperanza means hope and I know your words give others hope to be at peace.

  23. I love your attitude. Last month, I was diagnosed w/ Cancer… This month, someone asked me why I’m so calm about having Cancer. It’s simple actually. I’ve come to accept death & dying years ago (it does after all happen to everyone)… Not only that, I have no control over the fact that I have Cancer. Thus, why stress out about it? Why not focus on living instead?

  24. Yesterday I took my neighbor about 60 miles to her best friends funeral. One of the deceased friends gave a quote out of Ecc. that they day of your death is better than the day of your birth. To examine that concept, I believe babies are first in heaven and come to earth to begin their lives and what a shock it is to them to leave that comfortable womb in this world. When a person who has accepted the grace of Jesus Christ into their Hearts and made Him Lord of their live, dies, I believe they are immediately back in the Presence of the Lord in Heaven. Remember the one thief on the cross, He said, Lord remember me when you come into your Kingdom. Jesus looked at him and said, TODAY, you will be with me in paradise. Meanwhile, there is a lot of living and loving to do between the dashes. Keep the faith.

  25. Thank you so much for stopping by my new post ‘A new you! Is this possible?’, and liking it… I needed to check out your blog in return. What did I find? A woman who kicks back! I was touched not only by your writing about your journey and your ups and downs, but I was so struck by how you have touched the lives and souls of so many other people!

    I wish you well on your journey! We are all exactly where we need to be at this point in our lives, on our soul journeys to growth and emotional and spiritual healing! Our bodies will suffer sometimes so our spirit can learn lessons we would never, ever be able to comprehend on a deep gut level if all were easy.

    Difficulties and trials bring some kind of meaning into our lives, even if our minds can’t even begin to face it at this moment. At the very least we get pushed out into an arena that forces us to grow and develop inner areas that may never have had an opportunity to be stretched.

    β€œThe soul would have no rainbow, had the eye no tear.”- Unknown

    β€œIf it doesn’t challenge you, it doesn’t change you.” – Fred Devito

    β€œSome succeed because they are destined to, but most succeed because they are determined to.” – Henry Van Dyke

  26. Thanks for the like. I think your story is really amazing especially considering no one wants to talk about death. I believe death is just a matter of perspective dying the final one is ending your individualized perspective and becoming larger than yourself. It’s nothing to fear it is beautiful because it is life in another form.

  27. Love your posts. I am a survivor (so far) of Stage IV Melanoma and recently have started a blog that is mostly about my personal experiences of the last five years. Anyone interested can look for it on wordpress as mcreyscope’s musings or go to Hope to read more of your blog and hope you enjoy my postings too!

  28. My goal is to go back and re-read your blogs and get caught up and get to know the person behind cancerkillingrecipe. I liked your Secret post. I too, have robbed death a few times. When I was young, I somehow got a pair of wire cutters or pliers or something and was attempting to cut an electrical wire. Not sure why. Before that, my families favorite stories on how they almost lost me was when my father caught me by the ankles before I went overboard and onto the rocky shore from the boat. There was the time I was hit by a car. There was the children’s cancer I had while I was an adult that probably would have killed me when I was five if it had been detected. I still take life for granted, but posts like yours are good reminders. Thanks.

  29. Hey there:) Thank you for liking my post . Your words make since . I remember the words Que sera sera. Whatever will be will be ….Live life like there’s no tomorrow for you may never know when ones time is up:) Take care.

  30. Hello! Thank you for liking my post! Your writing is so wonderfully positive and inspirational. I love that! Please keep posting these and make us all feel great about our lives and ourselves!

  31. “And the good news is that we have to die only once” Nothing like being positive. πŸ˜‰ I’m not usually inspired, but that’s a beautiful line and I can tell you’re a beautiful woman. Something about you reminds me of someone..

  32. You are, undeniably an inspiration, To me. Thank you for your beautiful expression of generally perceived, by most, ‘bad’ things…illness, death and dying. As a pediatric oncology nurse for many years, I experienced and learned so much about faith, compassion and love of another, even a stranger. I retired from nursing 4 years ago, to focus on art and writing. Please allow me to share with you a song I co-wrote with my partner. It’s number 1 on angel radio!

  33. “People are asleep, when the die they wake up” Ali Bin Abu Taleb

    Admire your spirit.

    Sharing the below message I thought you might like it. This letter was found below the pillow one of the biggest thinkers of all time Imam Gazzali When he passed away.

    β€œSay to my friends, when they look upon me, dead
    Weeping for me and mourning me in sorrow
    Do not believe that this corpse you see is myself
    In the name of God, I tell you, it is not I,
    I am a spirit, and this is naught but flesh
    It was my abode and my garment for a time.
    I am a treasure, by a talisman kept hid,
    Fashioned of dust, which served me as a shrine,
    I am a pearl, which has left it’s shell deserted,
    I am a bird, and this body was my cage
    Whence I have now flown forth and it is left as a token
    Praise to God, who hath now set me free
    And prepared for me my place in the highest of the heaven,
    Until today I was dead, though alive in your midst.
    Now I live in truth, with the grave – clothes discarded.
    Today I hold converse with the saints above,
    With no veil between, I see God face to face.
    I look upon β€œLoh-i-Mahfuz” and there in I read
    Whatever was and is and all that is to be.
    Let my house fall in ruins, lay my cage in the ground,
    Cast away the talisman, it is a token, no more
    Lay aside my cloak, it was but my outer garment.
    Place them all in the grave, let them be forgotten,
    I have passed on my way and you are left behind
    Your place of abode was no deweling place for me.
    Think not that death is death, nay, it is life,
    A life that surpasses all we could dream of here,
    While in this world, here we are granted sleep,
    Death is but sleep, sleep that shall be prolonged
    Be not frightened when death draweth night,
    It is but the departure for this blessed home
    Think of the mercy and love of your Lord,
    Give thanks for His Grace and come without fear.
    What I am now, even so shall you be
    For I know that you are even as I am
    The souls of all men come forth from God
    The bodies of all are compounded alike
    Good and evil, alike it was ours
    I give you now a message of good cheer
    May God’s peace and joy for evermore be yours.”

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