Dementia talk.

As you know from my previous post from March 22 2017 – “I’m back” I’m taking care for this very nice, elderly Lady.
The Lady is now 97 years old and to tell you the truth. she is in lot better shape than I Am. Honestly.
One only problem she have, she have dementia…
Short memory loss.

This how average morning goes:

Good morning. How are you?
I’m okay.
Today is Monday.
No. Today is Saturday.
Oh Dear!
You want to take a shower later?
No. I took shower yesterday.
No. This was me showering yesterday.
Oh Dear! Okay.
Later I will do my laundry.
You did your laundry yesterday.
No. This was your laundry.
Oh Dear!
How is your sister doing?
I don’t have a sister.
Oh Dear!!!

Well, and this goes on and on.
I’m doing my best to cope with this all, but is getting harder and harder.
I told myself that this time I’m not going to quit, but my blood pressure is going higher and higher and I’m getting closer and closer to change my mind.

I’m feeling very sorry for the Lady, but I’m really worry about my health.

Loosing your memory is a tragedy.
Imagine, Not remembering what you did yesterday.

Well, I want to remember as long as I have to live.
I want to remember GOOD and BAD.
Without remembering BAD how I will know what GOOD is…
And how I can make plans for tomorrow if I would not remember what i have done yesterday…

Thank you for visiting.
God bless you all.

Pray for PEACE.

23 thoughts on “Dementia talk.

  1. I am praying for you and this lady. Be sure to take care of you too.
    It is a very scary and discouraging thing not being able to rely on yourself.
    Praise the Lord for His faithfulness. God loves you!

  2. That sounds like a very frustrating illness to live with. Does her doctor have her on any medication? I’ve heard that Lion’s Mane, which is a very odd looking mushroom, has had positive results in some Alzheimer’s studies. In case you’re interested in trying to see if it helps her, it’s an herbal remedy, so doesn’t need a prescription, but I would still think it would be wise to seek a doctor’s opinion.

  3. I’m a geriatric social worker and some of my clients have dementia or Parkinson’s. I have “re-met” a few of them a couple of times. I have heard stories over and over.

    One of the things that helps me is to to ask them how old they are. They will tell you whether they are 8 or 88 in their mind. This gives you an idea of how to approach things.

    For example, if they feel they are 8 and that their mother is still alive, you will talk to them as if they are 8 and if their mother is still alive.

    It does not do any good for them or for you to upset them by telling them they are not 8 and that their mother is dead.

    Next time try getting her attention off of things that she wants to do again that she did the day before. It’s quite easy to redirect their focus.

    I hope this helps 🙂

    1. Having experienced my own mother in dementia, I totally agree with your reply.
      Caring for a person with failing memory, does not have to raise one’s blood pressure.
      Merely agree with them and go about your business. It really helps on a day-to-day basis.
      best of luck to you.

      1. One time I had a lady who was looking for her dog (that was actually deceased), I told her to go look in one direction while I looked in the other. I was actually filling out paperwork and by the time she came back to me, she had forgot she was ever looking for him.

        It would’ve completely broke her spirit if I had told her the dog was dead and no longer existed.

        Calming a demented person down is a much greater task than going with the flow. ❤️

  4. My Mom is in this place and I find it a blessing that all she hangs on to of the past is blessings of God. She doesn’t remember any of the bad stuff just the goodness of God. And truthfully, plans are overrated and what does it matter what we did yesterday. The only day we have is today. And no matter our memory if our heart belongs to the Lord, everything is ok. He will see to it. Saying a prayer for you today.

  5. I can’t imagine how hard it must be to suffer from dementia. When we lose our memories, we lose our contact with the people we love, because we don’t know who they are anymore. It’s as if our whole identity is stolen!

  6. My own mum is starting to forget things. I don’t know if it is the pain meds or the cancer spreading. Scary stuff. I’ve had to learn a lot of patience this last year.

  7. Whenever you can, surround yourself in support. Supporting someone is amazing for you to do, even though the person you are helping won’t give you thanks. It isn’t about that. But you do need to ground yourself in some form of stability. Are there others who could switch out and help you? Is there a way for you to take a few days or some breathing room?

    Not one person’s health is more important than another. People forget this. While we try to lift someone up, we need to make sure we aren’t being stretched thin or pulled down. Otherwise our efforts will continue to dwindle, and our health as well.

    Taking care of yourself, will help this woman. Peace be upon you and God be with you.

  8. Personally, there are many yesterdays I don’t WANT to remember! At 97, I guess dementia is an entitlement, rather than a disease, but I know from bitter experience it is a fight you cannot win. The ship is sinking. No matter how perfect your humanity, you must save yourself…

  9. I used to care for an elderly lady with dementia. Our days were similar. And oftentimes I’d be asked the same questions multiple times. It does wear at your patience eventually but I always felt so bad for her that I didn’t actually mind too much.

  10. I remember telling my mother that the plastic flower she thought was real was plastic. She changed the subject. I wish I had just gone along with it. My 95 year old aunt seems to remember her childhood quite well, but not whether she had lunch. My husband says to, “join the journey.” I tell him he has to sing to me if I get dementia. He has hang ups about singing, but says he will because I won’t remember it. 🙂 I hope I have a sense of humor. Peace and blessings, Anna.

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